It's possible that every single one of those messages you needed to hear could also have been said kindly.

Absolutely. But I was better off hearing it unkindly than not hearing it at all. Also, and unkind message might jolt me into taking it more seriously.

Yeah, I get curious about the latter. I get it, those jolts appear to help sometimes, but ideally we'd treat it with the seriousness it deserves whether it was presented kindly or unkindly.