The #1 recommendation to have a hassle-free wedding is to get married in an 'off-month'. My wife and I got married in March, which is the second least popular month to get married in. It gave us so much leverage in setting our own prices. We got married in the city of San Francisco, which is a pretty competitive market. I would call and ask venues a year out and say 'We're getting married next year, do you have any availability'. Almost every one said 'no, we're completely booked'. Then I would tell them we're getting married in March, and they said 'we are free all of march.' Ultimately, we ended up getting a bunch of stuff for free. Like, my wife ordered flowers, and the company just threw in chair covers and ribbon. We didn't even want chair covers and ribbon originally (was too expensive when we researched it), but they just gave it to us!
Another tip is to not overthink it. We let each vendor handle their own deal. For example, my wife didn't tell the florist how to decorate. She said 'you are an expert with flowers, I want pretty flowers, make it look nice'. Along with this, I would choose pretty venues that are easily available or public. We had the reception on federal land, which means that the prices are somewhat regulated already. We also got married in one of the beautiful Catholic churches in the city, which needed no decoration whatsoever and was totally free (although, obviously, you have to be part of the community there).
Finally, do not waste money on a fancy photographer (probably my most controversial opinion). Photographers are expensive, and there's only one part that's super important to photograph (the ceremony). We could not afford a top-tier photographer for the entire thing. We instead hired a good photographer only for the ceremony. For the reception, I went on craigslist and hired a photography student. She wasn't as polished as the professional, but she gave us 1000+ photos which we later sorted through ourselves. Not only was this fun, but it was a lot cheaper. The professional photographer would have charged 3-4k for the entire night. Instead we spent $200 for the ceremony and $600 for the reception.
Get a wedding coordinator. That person's job is to listen to what the two of you want, and then to make it happen - over everyone else's opinions, if necessary. The wedding coordinator is the bad guy (no gender implied) to everyone else. If, for example, the bride's aunt wants to sit on the bride's parents' row, the wedding coordinator shuts that down, so you don't have to, so you don't have to fight with the bride's aunt.
A wedding doesn't have to be a massive production. You can just have a party, with family and friends. You don't need special software, you don't need to spend huge amounts of money. Really.
This is very dependent on the families involved. To some, the most important event of someone's life is their child's marriage. For some, it's considered disrespectful to not spend huge amounts of money on it, and this can create resentment in the long run.
Go on to your fiance's phone, computer, router, etc and block all of the wedding marketing engines from showing up in her google searches. This includes, but is not limited to, theknot, pinterest, etc. This will singlehandedly reduce cost and stress more than any other single action.
Another tip is to not overthink it. We let each vendor handle their own deal. For example, my wife didn't tell the florist how to decorate. She said 'you are an expert with flowers, I want pretty flowers, make it look nice'. Along with this, I would choose pretty venues that are easily available or public. We had the reception on federal land, which means that the prices are somewhat regulated already. We also got married in one of the beautiful Catholic churches in the city, which needed no decoration whatsoever and was totally free (although, obviously, you have to be part of the community there).
Finally, do not waste money on a fancy photographer (probably my most controversial opinion). Photographers are expensive, and there's only one part that's super important to photograph (the ceremony). We could not afford a top-tier photographer for the entire thing. We instead hired a good photographer only for the ceremony. For the reception, I went on craigslist and hired a photography student. She wasn't as polished as the professional, but she gave us 1000+ photos which we later sorted through ourselves. Not only was this fun, but it was a lot cheaper. The professional photographer would have charged 3-4k for the entire night. Instead we spent $200 for the ceremony and $600 for the reception.